Perception of glory

We don’t just stand outside and analyze the natural world as a beam, but let the beam fall on the eyes of our heart, so that we see the source of the beauty – the original Beauty, God himself. . . . All of God’s creation becomes a beam to be ‘looked along’ or a sound to be ‘heard along’ or a fragrance to be ‘smelled along’ or a flavor to be ‘tasted along’ or a touch to be ‘felt along.’ All our senses become partners with the eyes of the heart in perceiving the glory of God through the physical world” (184-85).-John Piper

India

I was one of those people with tears in my eyes when Oprah said she was going off the air.
I like to watch Oprah and it isn't really because I LOVE Oprah, it is more because Oprah has people on her show and I love people.
I like to learn about them and see what makes them tick. In another life I think it would be great to come back as the white version of Oprah. I like to ask questions and I love to have all of the information. I remember even as a speech pathologist I would love taking a person's history and finding out all the things that had ever been wrong with them. Then I would pour through their chart so that I could write my report with all of the significant moments recorded.
Mrs. O has her own network now which provides plenty of entertainment while I'm trying to pretend like I'm not torturing myself on the ellyptical.
On yesterday's Next Chapter she visited the Hindu Holy city of Vrindavan in Northern India where thousands of widows have been left to fend for themselves after being cast out of their families.

That alone is beyond tragic. But it gets worse.
They spend their days begging for food and being rewarded with one meager meal if they chant prayers six hours a day to their Hindu god that doesn't exist.
They do this hoping that when they are reincarnated they will perhaps come back and die before their next husbands.
So while I stare at my to do list and check off the things I have actually managed to get done today: grocery store, paint rusted freezer, workout, teach Julian, laundry, etc... I get to Bible study and prayer and I check it off because I have spent ten minutes memorizing and ten minutes reading the daily readings and maybe five minutes praying.
That is when I think of the widows.
Six hours a day chanting into thin air.
I wonder if they know there is a God who is real that hears prayers.
Then I wonder if I know.
Do I actually grasp the power of the lifeline gifted to me?
If I really understood the Savior of the world He wouldn't get checked off a to do list after 25 minutes.


Praying for the widows and for all of us that we would hold the magnificence of God close to our heart and value our access to Him as if it is the air we breathe.

Eggs and bacon

    So we have Bible and breakfast most mornings, that being a relative term since sometimes we don't eat until around 11:30.
Food for our body and food for our soul.
Just early enough to say it isn't lunch.
This has been a beautiful thing for me because though I typically squeeze in some quiet time during the day it is random and haphazard and certainly nothing at all like the quiet time I had before children. The luxury of spending hours pouring over His word and praying with worship music in the background. Now that season has past and He is asking me to live these words. Not to just read them and let them soak in and feel good to my soul but churn them out into my real life amidst these countless thankless tasks that only He sees.
       Today we are reading the story about Jesus teaching that when we invite people over we should not just invite our friends but those who are poor or crippled or basically uninvited by the rest of the world. He states plainly that if you do this you will be greatly rewarded in heaven.
 I brush it off as we finish up and start to clear the dishes away but this Word so powerful working along with the Holy Spirit wouldn't let me off the hook that easy.
 It hits me and I ask myself am I going to be one of the ones that really believes that Jesus meant what He said?
 Am I going to stand for truth no matter how inconvenient it is for the rest of society when they long to bend and break the sacredness of marriage between a man and a woman?
 Do I just read these words and contort them into beautiful sentences that make me feel comfortable?

Truth is not relative. 

We read this passage today when yesterday I just started memorizing James Chapeter 2.
 I memorized chapter one by some miracle and I feel like every single word in that chapter was written for me.
 Oh I need a lot of work people.
 But when I got to chapter 2 and the first part was about not showing partiality towards a person if they are poor or rich, I actually thought to myself, maybe I should skip this because I really don't "need" to memorize this as much.
 Seriously.

It was at that moment that God chose to flood my mind with all the times I have not chosen to sit next to someone at a Mom's gathering because as I put it, "she just wasn't my type".
But the glaring ridiculous shallow truth of it was that she was wearing something I would never wear, or she was really fat, or she looked like she didn't brush her teeth.

James Chapter 2:4- Have you not made distinctions among yourselves, becoming judges with evil designs?

verse 5 Did not God choose the poor in the world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom?

verse 9 ... if you show partiality, you are committing sin...

I am sick with remorse. I do and think that which I do not long to. This song from Derek Webb comes to mind and I start to sing it softly to a most gracious and forgiving God

I repent, i repent of my pursuit of america's dream
i repent, i repent of living like i deserve anything 
of my house, my fence, my kids, my wife 
in our suburb where we're safe and white 
i am wrong and of these things i repent

i repent, i repent of parading my liberty 
i repent. i repent of paying for what i get for free
and for the way i believe that i am living right 
by trading sins for others that are easier to hide 
i am wrong and of these things i repent

bridge
i repent judging by a law that even i can't keep 
of wearing righteousness like a disguise 
to see through the planks in my own eyes

i repent, i repent of trading truth for false unity 
i repent, i repent of confusing peace and idolatry 
by caring more of what they think than what i know of what we need 
by domesticating you until you look just like me
i am wrong and of these things i repent


And I thought we were just having Bible and Breakfast.... not around here there is way too much work that needs to be done.

Mom

She would wake me up by cheerfully singing, “Rise and Shine” and wasn’t hampered at all when I would moan and pull the covers over my head.

She would drive me around the world and back in a week and never seemed to tire of it.

She birthed me, sustained me, and taught me how to be.

Who could possibly measure the gifts a mother bestows upon her children?
Even the countless stars seem miniscule next to the sacrifice of a mother.

Her love planted flowers of security and confidence in my heart.

Her devotion to God led me to follow Him.

Her carefree laughter has brightened many days.

Her natural capacity to choose joy in spite of every possible circumstance has blessed me and given me the courage on most days to follow suit.

Thank you mom for teaching me what loyalty looks like.

For keeping promises that you could have easily broken.

For possessing a quiet strength that I never knew existed.

For not placing conditions on your love for anyone

For being an unending stream of wisdom, love, and encouragement that constantly flows through each day of my life.

Thank you.