Old Maid

When I was younger I would walk across the street to the top of the hill to play old maid with my great grandmother while we ate peanut butter crackers and sipped coca-cola. I would deal the cards and then of course be devastated if I ended up with the old maid. I would literally splay the cards across my hand with the old maid sticking sky high. My sweet grandmother would humor me and pick that lady out of my hands to be met with hysterical laughter by yours truly. So tonight while the kids and I have some time alone I suggest the game. I tell the boys my old tricks and so they follow suit. It was one burst of hysterical laughter after another and somewhere in the background I'm sure I heard my grandmother joining in.

Old man saves the day

As Julian and I were purusing the aisle at Aldi he spotted us.
You know the type. Sweet and around eighty with snow white hair on more than likely his only outing of the day.
He approaches with a smile and asks Julian if he is out of school today.
I hesitate for a moment knowing the path we have chosen isn't neccessarily accepted by all. I tell him that I teach Julian at home. I failed to mention that I am hanging on by a thread and that I question my decision almost weekly. Since for me selflessness is much more of an aspiration than a reality.
He walks over to me, this perfect angel stranger, and puts his hand on my shoulder and with all the sincerity he can muster he says, "That's the best thing you will ever do for your child. Oh he will be so smart. He sure is fortunate to have a mom who is willing to do it." I stand there for a moment stunned and I ask him how he knew to deliver such a precious jewel of encouragement to my heart at that moment. He just smiles and we chat for a while before going our separate ways.
There are so many things that I love about God and one of them is how intimately he knows his people.
He knows that I have had a thing for old men for as long as I can remember.
All of my favorite patients were these old geezers.
I could waste many a day away listening to their stories of yesteryear with such delight.
I have been in a place of dryness.
A place of reading the Bible out of obligation.
A place of hardly being able to talk to God because I couldn't penetrate the dark bubble I felt like I was trapped inside.
Yet, God never tires in his pursuit of a heart he has called.
For this magnificent, undeserving, unparalleled grace and for sweet little old men-
I humbly give thanks.

No excuses

It just got too crowded living in the land of excuses.
That is why after no sleep and with a sick child you see this picture.
Oh yes that is my beautiful darling sitting on top of the treadmill, next to the memory verses.
Nike are you hiring?
because I'm just doing it.

Sweet belly laughter

These boys keep me laughing.

Choice

I make my way across the sand with my ipod on something to get me started like this because even an elderly man can't keep from tapping his toes to Matchbox 20.
I just don't know if the song will be enough with this soggy beach and the wind trying to send me back home.
So, I have to turn the music off.
To focus.
To pray.
To struggle.
This is when I see the dolphins a few feet from the shore.
I hear the pelicans and seagulls amidst the crashing waves.
And above all this is a quiet whisper that says, "See, you aren't really running against the wind you are running with it. Choose to see my beauty."
No matter what the circumstance, God is ever present in our midst, waiting for us to notice.